If It Were

If it were up to me to forgive you
given you asking me to,
I couldn't 
because you are too close to 
being the cause of it
all.


Anyone can understand
the rush of killing
rage in the frenzy of
an attack as your buddy's
blood boils in that awful
heat.


But you, in the cool
of night, protected by
your X-Ray techniques,
bounced your end of the stretcher
as we carried
the wounded N.V.A. Soldier.


You had to call him
a "fucking gook" and 
turn his face white
with pain without
passion as an
explanation.